Tag Archives: Bobby Petrino

10 or Honorable Mention.) Lin-Sanity, Juan Pablo Montoya’s crash into a service truck loaded with jet fuel, Jim Irsay, NHL Lockout, Dez Bryant, Any Les Miles Press Conference, Anthony Davis’ Unibrow, Roger Goodell

9.) Timothy Bradley’s Judges: It’s difficult to differentiate between if Bradley is the turkey, or if the judges are the turkeys. Two of the three judges scored Bradley’s win over Manny Pacquiao 115-113 when anyone who watched the fight could see Pacquiao clearly won the fight. Many people believe boxing is just looking for a rematch because they know Pacquiao will eventually bite and boxing thrives off rematches. There’s also a belief the WBO wants an undefeated boxer in which Bradley is 29-0 thus making future fights easier to promote and commercialize what’s become a dying sport.

8.) Augusta National Adds Two Female Members: Time doesn’t move very fast in Augusta, Georgia. In fact, progressive thinking is about as ridiculous as a woman leaving the kitchen according to the assholes who run the Masters. After increasing criticism from the outside, former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice and Darla Moore became the first women allowed to wear the green jacket. Can’t you just see Condi puffing a cigar telling racial jokes with Hootie Johnson?

7.) Bob Costas’ Obsession with Michael Phelps: The Phelps thing isn’t officially over and never will be because now every four years we get to hear all about how he’s the “greatest Olympian ever.” I feel like Bob Costas is going to have a conniption fit when someone else swims to a Rio gold medal in 2016 as if suddenly acquiring Tourettes Costas will be shouting “Phelps is God, Phelps is God, Phelps is God.” Here’s an excerpt from Costas’ final interview with Phelps, “You’ve squandered your entire youth in training, Michael. Years and years of sculpting your body into a sophisticated aquatic machine. Twelve thousand calories a day just to keep your muscles from buckling under the strain. Now that it’s all over for you, will you waste away to a grey, bony wisp while pining for your days of glory? Or will your prodigious eating continue, turning your legendary frame into the burger-bloated corpus of a champion gone to seed? The first poetic blowjob ever recorded.

6.) Tennessee’s Treatment of Pat Summitt: Just a year after being diagnosed with early onset dementia-Alzheimer’s, Pat Summitt stepped down as the winningest coach in the history of college basketball. More than Coach K, more than Knight and Wooden. However, Pat Summitt in an affidavit she filed in conjunction with a lawsuit filed by a former colleague against the university and its athletics director Dave Hart, the legendary coach didn’t make the decision to step down on her own. Tennessee athletic director Dave Hart forced Summitt into either retirement, resignation or being fired. What a classy way to treat someone who gave you eight National Championships.

5.) NFL Replacement Refs: The replacements were a sham and a shame to the integrity of the game but it wasn’t all their fault. They should’ve never been put in such a position. Thankfully it all ended after an infamous blown call with the eyes of the nation watching Green Bay at Seattle on Monday Night Football. The Seahawks stole a victory after one of the worst blown calls in the history of sports and should be a game worse at 5-5 instead of 6-4 and Green Bay should be 8-2 instead of 7-3. The regular refs were on the field the very next week.

4.) Bobby Petrino: The legend of Bobby Petrino just keeps getting better and better. This guy has not only screwed over every fan base he’s coached and burned every bridge along the way, got fired in 2012 after a motorcycle accident with his mistress riding with. Obviously if the accident never happens Petrino’s affair is never found out, he keeps his job and Arkansas is a potential powerhouse contender. Sorry Bob, everyone always eventually gets caught.

3.) New York Jets: Do I really need to say anything more than Tim Tebow? Shame on GM Mike Tannenbaum and owner Woody Johnson for ever even considering this acquisition much less actually making this thing happen. Shame on Rex Ryan who’s always a turkey for yet another waste-of-breath guarantee. And shame on offensive coordinator Brian Schottenheimer for trying to work in a dual QB/wildcat scheme with one of the least talented offensive roster in the league. Needless to say, the Tebow project hasn’t worked. It’s been a total nightmare and ESPN continues to suck all the life out of this story as possible. The Jets traded away wins for popularity and hype and now they’re forced to finally make the decision of whether or not they sit Sanchez and start Tebow. The circus has yet to truly begin.

2.) Jeffery Loria and Miami Marlins: The Marlins dumped their roster after winning 69 games, after a one and done project that obviously didn’t work. Florida(Miami) has a rich history in fire sales but usually after winning a World Series. The terms ‘patience’ or ‘dynasty’ don’t exist in the Marlins’ front-office vernacular. The Blue Jays on the other end of the 12-player trade assumed the liability of $167 million in new payroll which is Turkey worthy in itself. Many “experts” will try to position Toronto as a 2013 favorite. But the Jays only won four more games than Toronto so the possibility of them vastly improving is hopeful speculation. In the end the city of Miami is stuck with a new stadium that will never fill up, a greedy owner in Loria (as if any owner isn’t greedy) and a community full of pissed off tax paying citizens and hopeless fans.

1.) Lance Armstrong: In August the U.S. Anti-Doping Agency announced that it was stripping Lance Armstrong of his seven Tour de France titles and 86′d him for life from the sport after concluding he used banned substances. In a sport where everyone was(is) guilty of doping, Armstrong tried to say he didn’t. Eventually Armstrong himself was tired of fighting against the allegations. “He deserves to be forgotten,” said UCI President Pat McQuaid of Armstrong and I can’t help but agree more. Armstrong will ultimately be remembered as a man with two faces. One of which was the heroic work he contributed to society through LIVESTRONG helping thousands of peoples lives. The other as a cheat. History almost always remembers the negatives first.